


holding my breath (you make it hard to breathe)

by minshuas



Category: Cravity (Band), X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: I'm not always evil, M/M, This hurt a bit in the wrong way.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:08:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26146918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minshuas/pseuds/minshuas
Summary: “Not in your wildest dreams,” says Hyeongjun with a teasing sort of smile that communicates everything and nothing all at once. And Woobin should believe him, but his wildest dreams have already happened. It is just that he also wants them to be reality.
Relationships: Seo Woobin/Song Hyeongjun
Kudos: 12
Collections: Challenge #5 - Lullabies and Dreams





	holding my breath (you make it hard to breathe)

**Author's Note:**

> aren't we all whipped for song hyeongjun, let's be honest

Dreaming about kissing your best friend is fine and incredibly normal.  _ Once _ . When it happens every night for two weeks, Woobin starts to get unsettled. Most of his time is spent with Hyeongjun, his roommate and sole confidante, so he can’t escape him nor can he find someone to spill the beans to. And now he has these _feelings_ and a fixation on his lips. 

To put it simply, he’s fucked. 

“Ruby,” Hyeongjun whines, reaching over to take away the wooden spoon from Woobin’s hands. He’s been sauteing the vegetables for a little too long. He’s distracted. Hyeongjun can tell. “I think they are good. We don’t want scorched veggies.” He’s pouting. Woobin can tell without looking over at him and he refuses to look over at him when he’s this close. It does things to his heart. Things he can’t comprehend.

“Right.” He says, turning the stovetop off and moving away from the oven (and moving away from Hyeongjun). “Sorry, I spaced out there for a second.” His attempt at a smile falls short, but hopefully Hyeongjun is too preoccupied with the veggies to look his way. 

If he notices, he doesn’t say anything, just removes the pan from the stove. He busies himself with plating the veggies while Woobin tries not to hyperventilate. He  _ needs  _ to get out of the kitchen. When they moved in, he had told Hyeongjun that it was too small. Now. Under these circumstances. It is stifling. 

Hyeongjun turns on him abruptly. It makes Woobin jump. “What’s been up lately?” He’s using his ‘serious’ voice, but he has no idea how serious this actually is. Woobin glances at him, but his gaze catches on his lips. In his chest, his heart stutters. Hyeongjun takes absolutely no notice of the turmoil going on within Woobin. 

“You’ve been distracted and weird,” he continues when Woobin doesn’t answer him. 

Shrugging, Woobin forces his gaze away. “Have I?” He laughs, but it comes out awkward. Hyeongjun sees right through him both because he’s transparent and because they’re best friends. His gaze narrows. Woobin’s resolve breaks and he decides  _ what the hell _ . Throwing caution to the wind, he decides to jump into treacherous waters. He already feels his throat dry up, even before the words come up.“What do you think about us? Like  _ us us _ ? If we were together… In a _relationship_. Like boyfriends.” 

The way that Hyeongjun’s eyes widen gives Woobin a little ounce of hope, but he tries to swallow that down. It could just be horror at the mere thought. “Not in your wildest dreams,” says Hyeongjun with a teasing sort of smile that communicates everything and nothing all at once. And Woobin should believe him, but his wildest dreams have already happened. It is just that he also wants them to be reality. 

This time, his laugh gets stuck in his throat. He knows how he looks, crestfallen and embarrassed, but he can’t help it. Hyeongjun picks up on it, but not fast enough because Woobin makes sure to leave the scene. He can feel his heartbeat in the soles of his feet as they carry him farther and farther away from their little apartment. If he looked back, then he would have seen that Hyeongjun was calling after him. 

He takes himself two blocks before Hyeongjun catches up with him. They are both out of breath, standing outside a popular cafe. The line stretches out onto the sidewalk. Some customers glance at them, but Woobin is only focused on the fact that Hyeongjun followed after him. That’s not something that happens. He doesn’t know what to do because he never thought he would be having to face this. If he could go back in time, then he would just go back minutes ago and stop himself from being brave. Now, it feels like he’s in a k-drama.

“You were being serious.” Hyeongjun says, innocent eyes blown wide. “I thought you were joking to try to cover up something else. Y’know, just playing around like you usually do..” He shakes his head. “I’m such an idiot.”

Woobin is quick to disagree. “It was inappropriate to bring up at all.”

Now, it is Hyeongjun disagreeing. This whole exchange feels awkward. Woobin might get sick. “No, no. I just should’ve read the room.” Cautiously, he takes a step forward. He’s chewing on his lip and it distracts Woobin for long enough that he misses what Hyeongjun says next. 

“What?” He asks, blinking. His gaze drifts up to catch the curious look that Hyeongjun sends him. “Sorry…”

Hyeongjun takes his arm, pulling him down into an alleyway. Here, the sunlight is harsh. It hits off the trash receptacles and makes Woobin squint. It makes the smells of the trash worse in a way. “I said that I  _ lied _ .” He says, pouting as he crosses his arms. “I didn’t mean what I said. I said it because I thought  _ you  _ were joking.”

There is a weakness showing. Woobin doesn’t know whether he wants to step into his space or draw out of it completely. There’s an atmospheric pull, but he fights it. Dreams are just that. They aren’t meant to be anything else. They don’t have to be reality. 

Just to amuse himself, just as he’s leaning closer to Hyeongjun, Woobin pinches himself.    
He doesn’t feel pain. 

.

.

.

When he wakes up that morning, Hyeongjun is in the kitchen mixing something together in their biggest mixing bowl. Woobin gets close, but not close enough to let himself imagine what it would be like if he could wrap his arms around his waist. He keeps a safe distance and when Hyeongjun turns to beam at him like the sun has arisen, he turns to make coffee, ignoring the way his heart is pounding in his chest. 


End file.
